Why Weeaboos really grind my Gears

I find weeaboos to be really irritating. For those of you that are uninformed, a weeaboo is a slang term for a white guy (female weeaboos exist, They are less common, but I assure you, just as irritating as their male counterpart) who is obsessed with Japan. These people bother me because I actually think Japan sounds like a dreadful place from my American perspective, and why somebody would want to live there instead of America baffles me. Alas, these people seem intrigued with this entire culture that they know of only by watching cartoons.

This is of course, incredibly silly. These people are under a strange impression that Japan would be accepting of them if they were to go there, which is funny, because Japan is a notably elitist country. Furthermore, weeaboos seem to think that Japanese women (or men) will be attracted to them. These people are wrong, for their dating lives will be just as lonely and miserable in Japan as they are in their home country. Yes, that does mean you. While it is true that you may be a foreigner, which is interesting, your personality will remain the same, and as your true colors come out, it will be revealed that they don’t actually find your personality all that attractive, as you just sit there fascinated by the things they do everyday. After that, they will leave you for a Japanese man (or girl) in the same fashion the members of the opposite sex practice in your home country.

Although delusions of Japan wanting the average weeaboo to move to their county greatly grind my gears, these conversations are quite easy to avoid. Unlike these conversations many weeaboos will decide to use Japanese phrases in their everyday speaking. This is strange, inconsistent, and usually holds no meaning to those who don’t speak the language, or the butchered variant that weeaboos speak. So while these people may feel that they are more cultured, they are in fact just butchering their own language into something neither native speakers nor people from Japan would be able to understand. This would be tolerable if your average weeaboo was actually attempting to learn a significant amount of Japanese, but overall, most are content to learn about 1 semester’s worth, and then just slip that knowledge into their sentences.

Of course, I get really irritated when weeaboos act like Japan has something better going than America. There is a very interesting irony in this though. Anime prices are much higher in Japan! It costs about 40$ for a DVD with 2 episodes! I know this is probably going off of new titles, but that’s outrageous! Ironically, it would lead to weeaboos that actually make it to Japan finding that it is much more expensive to maintain their hobby in it’s country of origin than in another country! Prices on produce are like this too! It costs 50$ for a watermelon out there. No wonder they always eat rice! Furthermore, population density is much higher there, meaning things would be much more crowded. Why would anybody obsess over Japan when we can get their stuff in other countries for even better prices than the Japanese themselves pay!

Hence, if you encounter a weeaboo, Japanophile, wapanese guy, or whatever you prefer to call them, make sure to give them a good paddling.

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Anime in Focus: Devil May Cry episode 1

<-It should be noted that while Dante is a total badass, his enemies are not

This show is available legally here

Because Funimation is significantly cooler than you.

Alright, the first episode of Devil May Cry. It starts off with our resident badass, Dante, entering a bar, then kicking ass. This is unsurprising simply because Dante ALWAYS kicks ass. Unfortunately, suspense is in short supply, because Dante’s half demon heritage makes him mostly bulletproof. It should be noted that he has an arsenal of unbreakable weapons that he is highly capable of kicking ass with. This gives the anime the overall suspense level of a Bruce Lee movie.

Anyways, the rest of this episode is about Dante protecting a little girl who is supposed to be inheriting a fortune. Apparantly, some of her conniving family members have enlisted some demonic help to ensure that the fortune goes to them instead of her. Meanwhile, Dante has to get her to some place before a certain time for her to be able to inherit this fortune. Along the way they get attacked by a demonic truck, a demon on a train, and demonic opera singers. While the last one is pretty interesting, most fights seem to lack any danger factor.

In the end, Dante winds up being forced to adopt the girl and keep her at Devil May Cry, most likely to develop him a bit later. I’m curious as to how child services would feel about Dante taking care of a kid, due to his ridiculous lifestyle, but alas, I’m sure they’d be way too busy filling out paperwork.

Overall, I recommend this series if you want a fix of Devil May Cry because you’ve played the games way too much, or because they keep kicking your ass. Sadly, the fights do not have nearly as much energy as the fights in the games, and don’t last nearly as long. As an action series, it’s kind of okay, but at least Funimation released it for free.

Next Episode->

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The world of Pokemon is just plain stupid

 <-While Pikachu may appear cute and cuddly, people seem to forget that it could electrocute you to death just as easily as Emperor Palpatine could. Fortunately, Pikachu forgets that too

As I was suffering from a major addiction to Pokemon Platinum, I got to the villains epic speech, and for a moment there, I just had to facepalm at the ideologies he was spouting.

Indeed, I am referring to the leader of Team Galactic, Cyrus. In the game, we meet him and hear about he wants to destroy the current order of things in order to create a new world without the flaws of the old one, sort of like Hikawa from Shin Megami Tensei Nocturne. However, today is not the day where I compare collecting Pokemon to collecting demons. This is the day where I state that Cyrus is stupid for complaining about the flaws in the Pokemon world, when it really has none.

We need to ask ourselves what is so bad about a world where we can safely send a 10-year old kid out in the wilderness with hostile animals, in order to do battle with horrible creatures, and come out a-OK. This is a world where we solve out problems with criminal organizations by having little creatures battle each other (only until they faint mind you!) until the other side runs out of little creatures, then the criminals give up their plans! Almost nobody pulls a gun, and Pokemon only very rarely attack people, and even rarer are Pokemon attacks fatal. Furthermore, the biggest crime syndicates focus their entire operations on Pokemon, rather than people. This is to say that without the Pokemon, the people would go largely unharmed, because the criminal organizations only seem to care about controlling them. Hence, the entire economy is run entirely based on Pokemon, while criminal activity that deals with other issues is largely unheard of.

Furthermore, we should look to the Pokemon themselves and realize that they too act in an idealized fashion. What is there to stop a wild Rhydon from killing a trainer after it KO’s all of their Pokemon? Nothing really. An Alakazam is said to have an amazingly high IQ. What is stopping it from using it’s powers of hypnosis to possess people, and use them to rule the world? Well, Mewtwo tried that in the first movie, but do you know what stopped him? HE DIDN’T FEEL LIKE CONQUERING THE WORLD! Him and his army of clones could have easily taken over civilization as we know it, but he didn’t because there was good in him.  Not to mention, there are several Pokemon like Tyranitar, Dragonite, Garchomp, and Gyarados that could easily crush cities with their powers, but we never see any villiages smashed because of them running around. Why? Because all of the REALLY powerful Pokemon have trainers that they listen to, despite being able to crush these trainers like the little flies they are. This means that the toughest beings in the universe are willing to just be captured and pit against each other, in futile battles that they never get killed in!

This is why I had a lot of trouble reading the speeches made by the team galactic leader. The worst part of the Pokemon universe is the threat of people stealing your Pokemon. Parents don’t even have to worry about bad thing happening to their children! These parents let their children go out and travel the world, mostly by themselves, and nothing ever happens to them! The kids come back fine, despite being attacked by monsters that could easily snap them in half, criminal organizations don’t shoot them for getting in the way, and society moves on just fine. They keep sending their kids out, and nothing bad happens, so they don’t feel the need to stop doing it! It’s basically a perfect world, where everything works out fine just because you love your Pokemon! Who would want to change that?

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Anime in Focus: Classic: Golden Boy Episode 1

Hm, this anime was introduced to me by one of the anime clubs older presidents. It was… interesting to say the least. As a programmer, I wanted to ram my head into the floor when I saw the ending, but I try not to let that dictate the experience.

Anyway, this episode starts with the main character on a bicycle getting hit by a car. Out of the car steps a rich lady who hands him a million yen just to shut him up. By the way this woman is dressed; we can clearly tell that she is most likely a high class prostitute or incredible stripper. This is supported by her outfit, as seen below, which is tiny, bouncy, and you can clearly see her nipples. It’s very noticeable, I assure you.

Then, our hero, Kintaro Oe, witnesses a robbery, then runs off to his new job, while writing stuff in his notebook he constantly refers to. Anyway, he gets to his new job, which is a programming firm run by….. That prostitute from earlier? And a whole bunch of other attractive women? No males? What the hell? I know for a fact nobody that hot becomes a programmer! Programming firms are ALWAYS run by a bunch of dudes! (Not saying women can’t program, I’m just saying they don’t) This is false advertising, and I can assure that female programmers are overall just as unattractive and undateable as the male counterparts (trust me, not even programmers want to date programmers.) Anyway, Kintaro is expecting a programming job but unfortunately for him, he gets relegated to menial labor (despite what he thinks, nobody learns to program overnight.) Such as cleaning toilets.  Then we see a rather… interesting scene of Kintaro fantasizing about his boss whipping him. It was kind of silly.

Anyways, this episode revolves around the shenanigans that occur being the only male working at a programming firm run by women (DOES NOT COMPUTE) such as what goes on in the locker room, and learning how to write a fully functional COMMERCIAL program within a week (wait, WHAT!?!) Well, the other people I know said it was funny, but my experience as a programmer greatly hindered my enjoyment. However, the rest of the series appears to go away from that concept, so I may give it a second chance. Not to mention, since there are only six episodes, it wouldn’t be that much commitment.

Coming sometime:

NEXT EPISODE

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Project Profile: The Cure

Vote for The Cure in the Small Press Idol competition

Complete Project 

Previous Artist: SabreTooth Fox

I know I’m a bit late on this week’s artist profile, had final exams and a minor Pokemon addiction. Alas, I did manage to locate a pretty good pair of artists for this week’s segment. This week’s feature is on The Cure, a comic being created by Eric Lebow and R.G. Rubens, sent to me by Egg Finger.

This is the story of a post apocalyptic world, where people are forced to live in domed cities where everything they eat or drink needs to be purified. One particular dome known as Salvation canyon, is being run by Reverand John Stone, leader of a church telling people that this is the only place left in the world, while running a criminal organization. Now, one man emerges in attempt to bring this people to life. In this festering pit of disease and wretched filth, people need…. THE CURE!

Here’s a black and white cover shot, featuring The Cure and Reverand Stone.

(click to enlarge)

On another note, we have a profile of our main,

Now then, while I like the concept, (particularly the three dimensional logo on his chest)

I’m not too fond of the font used in the bio thingies. Radiation is a common source of superpowers, however, I like how the radiation has been incorporated into the actual powerset, rather than say, giving him spider powers.

And on the flipside, We have a bio of Reverend Stone, our local totalitarian dictator/ fascist priest

I particularly like the fact that his sword is all broken up. I hope they’ll explain that if the book gets released, because that has the potential to be cool. 

Now then, this project has released its first three pages, which look very nice: (probably need to click them to read)

These sort of set up the premise, and most importantly show how it will look in action if it gets done. Furthermore, it shows that the author has the potential to go through with their premise, and isn’t all talk.

Third page is available on the small press idol page. While you’re there, why not stop by and give it a vote? We must support small artists, and prevent America’s comic industry from becoming stagnant and run by two or three large companies who rarely produce new characters!

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Why subbed anime is important

Alright, after last week’s post, I’m gonna go turn around and play devil’s advocate. As it stands, there are many undeniable advantages of watching an anime in Japanese with English subtitles over watching it with an English dub.

1.)    Horrible Dub: The first and most obvious reason for choosing to watch a sub over a dub. Sometimes you listen to a dub and just go “Wow, are they reading this off of the script?” or “Do they even believe what they are talking about?” A good dub won’t do this, but if it does, you should probably be watching the sub

2.)    It fits better: While this is not always the case, when I’m watching something like Rurouni Kenshin, or another show that takes place in early Japan, it just makes perfect sense for the show to be in Japanese. This adds an extra level of immersion, because you very well know they didn’t speak English in ancient Japan, That is, unless there was some conspiracy and Japanese is just a made up language they created to screw with foreigners. That WOULD explain why it’s so hard to learn.

3.)    It’s closer to the source material: Most anime is written with a Japanese audience in mind. This means the show is written with Japanese voices in mind. Hence, dialogue and character movements were made with the intent to have Japanese voicing, meaning that the entirety of the show was based around having a Japanese dub, meaning the show flows more naturally with Japanese voice acting

4.)    Suspension of disbelief: Some stuff is just so cheesy that you can’t say it with a straight face. This is especially prevalent in fantasy series, where the concept is just so out there people have trouble saying it with a straight face. Meanwhile, with a sub, you don’t actually HEAR them say it, so it blends in with the plot better. At least in my experience.

Out of all of these reasons, I believe that number 3 is most impotant, followed by number 1. This is due to the original artist having the most impact on how the voice actor performs. This however, does not always prove to be the most important factor, as shown by Cowboy Bebop, where the original voice actors just get one-upped by the English cast. Of course, I believe that the most important thing is to remember that the best time for a sub of a dub is based entirely on the series, and that generalized statements cannot be made in this field.

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