I'm stuck in a love Triangle with myself

 <-This is the best picture I could find of the mysterious person who sent me this letter.

 <-Previous Fan Letter: Do skills learned in dating sims transfer to real life?

Dear BryAnime,

I’ve been having a strange issue. You see, I’m living a double life. While I’m normally a mild mannered high school student, on the side I’m really a super-hero. I can’t specify which super hero for obvious reasons, but it has had horrible effects on my dating life.

You see, not only does having a super alter ego cut into my free time (making dating difficult) but it also shows me a darker side of the city. For example, I’ve noticed that the girl I like (in my regular life) tends to wind up in seedier parts of town, resulting in me having to rescue her on multiple occasions, from rapists, muggers, and the occasional supervillian. Now then, when I rescue her, she feels the need to reward (see: make out) with me. This is all fun and games until in my regular life, I ask her out, and she seems disinterested.

This leads me to a strange problem. Every time I hang around my crush, she just talks about my other life, and considers me pretty irrelevant because I’m not nearly as exiting as super me. This leads me to an unfortunate situation where I can’t actually compete with myself.

Is there any way that I can convince my crush that I’m a great guy, and that she should be interested in me instead of um… super-me?

Sincerely,

Your Friendly neighborhood super-hero

Dear Friendly neighborhood super-hero,

You appear to be in a very difficult situation. How you approach this is entirely up to you, depending on the results you want.

Hypothetically, you could engage in rampant sex with your girl on a regular basis as your super alter ego, never telling her who you are. This could be fun, since the super-sex could entice her to pursue your super alter-ego more often. I would suggest you avoid this if you want a healthy relationship between your everyday persona and your crush.

Alternatively, you could partake in the ancient practice of super-dickery, and tell her off the next time you encounter her in a seedy neighborhood. This will be better for her long-term health, and would ignite a spark between your regular persona and her.

On another note, you could tell her about the conundrum. This is incredibly dangerous, as soon a super villain will find out and hold her hostage, and nobody wants that. It’s because of issues like these that cause many people to believe that Batman has a horrible love life, although nobody is really sure how that is.

Sincerely, BryAnime

Get Featured in a fan letter! Email you're problems to DarthSomebody@yahoo.com, or post it in the comments section, and I just might respond to you!